Being Parent: Equal share of Thrill and Joy just like a ride to rollercoaster
"Children have never been very good at listening to their elders , but they have never failed to imitate them ." - James Baldwin
To
be a parent is something precious that god has blessed us with; so
when we are bringing up our future nation, we should promise ourselves
that the precious gift of god will be a good human being in future . To
be a good parent you need to know how to make your children feel valued
and loved while teaching them the difference between right and wrong .
Good
parenting helps foster empathy, honesty, self-reliance, self control, kindness, cooperation and cheerfulness says Steinberg. It also promotes
intellectual curiosity, motivation and desire to achieve. It helps to
protect children from developing anxiety, depression, eating disorders,
anti-social behaviour and drug abuse .
So , we should remember , -
ACTION
MATTERS: Our kids are continuously watching us, so what we do to make
a difference ? So, parents don't just react on the spur of the moment,
ask yourself what will be it's result ? Is that you want to accomplish ?
We should always be careful about our behavior towards everyone around
us including our maids as our children are the best imitators .
TOO
MUCH OF ANYTHING IS DANGEROUS: Too much of love or too much of
strictness can ruin your child's future. Here too much of love doesn't
mean the affection, it means the material possessions what we give our
children in place of love. As a result they fail to understand the
feelings called LOVE and the value of money also, but instead of giving
them any material objects a gentle cuddle, a little encouragement, appreciation or even a smile can go long way. Sometimes for no mistake
a child gets a punishment. For example, while drinking milk if a child
spills some milk on his/her dress, then as a punishment
he is denied of his/her favourite toy for a whole day. In both the cases children
will become stubborn or will pick up some bad habits or will disobey
their parents if this process continued .
RULES
ARE FOR EVERYONE: If you want to set some rules for your child at home, make sure that the rules should be followed by everyone at your home
and you should enforce reasonable rules . For example, if you want
that your children shouldn't watch television while having their meals,
make sure no one in the house does so. If any guest comes to
your place don' t allow him/her to do so. Otherwise the children feel
rules are for them only and can be broken by adults. So, when they
grow up, can break the rules and can do anything. this way children
sometimes stop believing their parents and a sense of disrespect grow
inside .
AVOID COMPARING YOUR CHILDREN WITH
OTHERS: Every child is unique, celebrate their differences. If you
constantly compare your child with others or with his/her siblings,
they may get an idea that they can never be good enough in your eyes and
it will develop a rivalry too. If your children are quarreling don't
choose sides , but be fair and neutral and avoid favouritism. If you
want to help them improve their behaviour, talk about meeting their
goals on their own terms, instead of telling them act like their sister
or neighbour.
LISTEN TO YOUR CHILDREN:
Communication is very important for both ways. You should create an
atmosphere in which your children can come to you with any problem. If
your child says that he /she has to tell you something, take it
seriously. You can even make a fixed time everyday to sit with him /her
and talk with him/her . You can share some of your problem with your
child which is not a big one. This will give your child a sense that
you are depending on him/her and rely on him / her too. It will make
your child independent and confident moreover a problem solving skill
will also grow which will help him /her in future.
By the Guest writer
Ms. Mamata Mitra
Principal, Shemrock Parrot Preschool, Santoshpur
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